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#crankypants, #emotionalrollercoaster

I’m cranky.

Worse yet, I’m still cranky.

My dog started barking at 4:15 a.m. TODAY, so I got up (because Lord knows my husband wasn’t going to budge and I had to get up in 45 minutes anyway) to walk her.

I was cranky on and off all day yesterday.

It started out just fine.

Despite

Ridiculously low temperatures

ridiculously low temperatures,

I still planned to do my speed workout. Alas, the only way it was going to happen was

on a treadmill at the YMCA.

on a treadmill at the YMCA.

I used to hate the thought of this, but as you can tell from my expression

at the end of the workout, it really wasn't bad at all.

at the end of the workout, it really wasn’t bad at all.

I hadn’t done speed work since October, and easing into it with 12x400s was a good way to go.

During my second 400 I said to Christy, “That last one didn’t seem too bad.”

During the fourth 400 I said to Christy,  “I am now feeling the cumulative effects of the 400s.”

I wrapped up and headed to work, which was mostly fine but a few people/issues were just getting under my skin and I couldn’t shake it, and so my attitude all day seemed to be, “Screw them.  I am sick of their behavior. No more Mr. Nice Guy on my part.”

I wrapped up the day and got ready to head out the door for yoga.

Yoga, you ask? But you already did a track workout in the a.m.

Yes, yoga.  On Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I do two workouts a day-one in the a.m. and one in the p.m.

But right before I left work, this popped up in my email from the Chicago Marathon:

GULP!  I'm not sure I'm ready to do this.

GULP! I’m not sure I’m ready to do this.

What’s the big deal? I’ve run 6 marathons before, I’m pretty sure I can handle it.  But….I just snagged my PR in Detroit and committing to another marathon means potentially NOT getting a PR or loosing my other PR.  I think I want to hold onto the success of that Detroit run a little longer.  And causing me greater consternation is that I have to decide by February 19, 2013.  More stress.

So here I am at yoga. I didn't know it at the time, but the look on my face was a foreshadowing of the class.

So here I am at yoga. I didn’t know it at the time, but the look on my face was a foreshadowing of my class experience.

We had a sub last night, and I just wasn’t gellin’ with her.  And my arms were killing me. And I was sweaty. And my clothes didn’t fit right. And I’m so sick and tired of my back and neck being sore.

And all her crazy talk about washing away the day and listening to my breath and following it and respecting it and my body and not judging because it isn’t a competition.  What? I run marathons! I am competitive.  I do judge people.

If she had said one more time, “Let’s all meet in downward dog,” I thought I would scream.  I never, ever want to meet anyone in downward dog.  I want to meet people downtown for a drink. Who wants to meet in downward dog? My shirt rises up and I know people can see my flesh pouring over the side of my shorts which don’t come up high enough on my waist.  Not to mention the fact that the cellulite dimpling in my upper thighs were just…

And then….I was able to do a pose I had never done before, and one I didn’t think I could ever do.

And then, even though she started shavasana too late and made it too short, at the end she said, “I respect and honor the light inside of you,” and I got a little bit of emotional boost from that.

And then, I walked out to put my boots on and found this

a wonderful note from my wonderful husband, who was at home making my dinner while I worked out.

wonderful note from my wonderful husband, who was at home making my wonderful dinner while I worked out.

I guess despite the ups and downs of yesterdays, at least there were ups.

And even though I slept horribly last night and was awoken to the sounds of a barking dog at 4:15, I’ve actually manged to get in a blog post before heading off to the YMCA this morning to swim, and then to work, and then back again to the YMCA tonight for strength training for runners and pilates.

I hope your day is filled with more ups than downs.

Carry on friends, carry on.

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One Comment Post a comment
  1. danlynnemixer@charter.net #

    I’ve run every day this year outside and was thinking of not going out to run today -4 but your blog pushed me right out the door. What a beautiful day it is and I am such a lucky person to live in the beautiful north with time to do about anything I want to do. Love you and am looking forward to seeing you, Doug, and the loving pets this Friday

    January 23, 2013

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